As a headteacher, you’re used to making decisions all day long—big ones, small ones, and everything in between. But sometimes, the smallest question can feel like the heaviest weight. I remember being asked, “Should we order the blue books or the orange books?” It was such a simple, inconsequential choice, but at that moment, I wanted to tear my hair out. It wasn’t really about the books. It was about the sheer volume of decisions I had already made that day—and the emotional toll they were taking.
That seemingly trivial question was the straw that could have broke the camel’s back. It wasn’t just about the decision itself but the weight of constantly having to decide everything for everyone.
The Emotional Weight of Decisions
Decision-making isn’t just a cognitive process—it’s an emotional one. As leaders, we carry the responsibility of ensuring our choices align with the needs of our staff, students, parents, and the wider school community. Even the smallest decisions chip away at our mental energy, and over time, they add up.
The emotional toll comes from the knowledge that:
• Every choice feels significant: Even small decisions can have a ripple effect on your team or your school.
• You’re the go-to person: When everyone depends on you, it’s hard to say, “I don’t know” or delegate effectively.
• There’s rarely a break: From the moment you wake up to the end of the school day (and beyond), decision-making is relentless.
It’s no wonder that by the time we’re asked something minor, like “blue or orange,” it feels utterly overwhelming.
A Reflective Exercise for Decision Awareness
One of the most powerful exercises I use as a well-being coach is to help clients uncover just how much energy goes into decision-making—often without them realising it. Here’s how it works:
1. Write Down Your Decisions
I ask clients to journal every decision they can recall making that day. It could be as small as choosing what to wear or as significant as approving a school-wide policy.
2. Rate the Decisions
Next, we categorise them:
• How much gravitas did each decision carry? Was it life-altering, or could it have been delegated?
• How much importance did it have in the grand scheme of things?
3. Reflect on the Insights
The exercise often reveals that a significant amount of energy is spent on low-gravitas, low-importance decisions. These could easily be delegated, automated, or even ignored.
Through this process, headteachers can visualise the mental load they carry and identify opportunities to focus their energy on decisions that truly matter.
How to Lighten the Load
If you feel like the “blue or orange books” question is your breaking point, here are some strategies to help:
1. Create Decision Filters
Develop simple frameworks or policies for recurring decisions. For example: “All exercise books will be blue unless there’s a compelling reason otherwise.” This eliminates the need for trivial choices.
2. Delegate with Clarity
Trust your team to make more decisions. Be clear about their responsibilities and empower them to take ownership of certain tasks.
3. Journal to Reclaim Perspective
Use the journalling exercise to track your decisions and reflect on the balance between low-importance and high-importance choices. Over time, this practice will help you refocus your energy.
4. Say “No” or “Not Now”
Every decision you make takes time and energy. Don’t be afraid to decline non-essential tasks or ask someone to return later with a clear proposal.
5. Prioritise Your Well-Being
Decision fatigue is a sign that you’re running on empty. Regular breaks, mindfulness, and self-care practices will help you replenish your reserves.
A Final Thought
The next time a seemingly minor question makes you want to scream, remember: it’s not the question—it’s the cumulative weight of being the decision-maker for everyone, every day. By becoming more aware of your decision-making patterns and learning to delegate or simplify where you can, you’ll not only reduce decision fatigue but also create space for the decisions that truly matter.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed, know that you’re not alone—and there’s always a way forward. Start small, reflect often, and give yourself the permission to let go of what doesn’t need your energy.